Some of you may be headed to your dictionary to look up "hoary" never having seen it before. I believe it may only be found in the King James Version, (Leviticus 19:32 and Proverbs 16:31). Since that is the version I was raised with, having been given my own copy at the age of ten, I learned quite a few archaic words that stretched my vocabulary at that young age. Thee, thou, yea, and all the "eths" seem so dated, because, well, they are. The only other accepted Lutheran translation at that time, the Revised Standard Version, I received at the age of eight. I used some of my own money to finally buy a more modern translation at 16. Though it proved easier to read and understand, I was so used to the poetic nature of the Psalms it proved difficult to appreciate the newer version. So I read both versions to satisfy my need for bible study. I'm so glad I did.
Now that I've provided some background, I will get to my point in this blog entry. I spent the morning crying after I got up (about 4:15 a.m.). So many emotions and observations overwhelmed me and I did what I do best to relieve the pressure of knowing some things are not right in my world. For that matter, in the world at large. The hoary-headed are no longer valued in our society. There was a time, as recently as the 20th century when the elderly were revered for having acquired much experience and wisdom as a result and were sought out for advice and insight gained by having been through so much.
That's no longer the case. Many times, the hoary-headed ones, (including myself at 68), are dismissed, devalued, ignored, even ridiculed, and abused. I don't know if it's because younger generations haven't been raised to respect the older members of families and society. There is growing resentment of my generation because some have been successful financially, forgetting the ones who gave up careers to raise children at home. Putting a career on hold means the earning power and opportunities for advancement in employment for women are gone for good. Working in the public or non-profit sectors also means less earning power. But the wealth of experience is invaluable yet too often overlooked.
I think of my husband, who at eight years older than me has Alzheimer's. His cognitive abilities are greatly impaired, yet there remains a wealth of wisdom buried beneath his confusion and unpredictable actions. It needs effort to draw out, but that requires patience and respect for him despite his no longer being as sharp as he once was. It's in there.
The day may come when I will no longer be able to care for him at home and will have to find a place where he will be treated as a human made in God's image, still worthy of respect, love, and care. And that is what led to the tears. Then in my weak humanness, I selfishly moved toward my unknown future and wondered if I will end up in a home reeking of urine and understaffed neglect with poor care due to no respect. Would I be just another burden barely surviving, and left waiting to die? Begging God to die to escape?
Thou shalt rise up before the hoary head, and honor the face of the old man, and fear thy God: I am the Lord.
Those who have grown old are worthy of honor and respect. They may be badly wrinkled and move slowly. Some are veterans of wars who still bear the scars. The elderly may not be quick enough in the checkout line for some. They may find newer technology daunting and need help but is that such a bad thing? Is patience a virtue that has been abandoned and not to be desired? If that is the case, then our society is poorer for it and has lost access to a special wealth that will die off rapidly in the coming years.
So many questions I should have asked my parents and grandparents when I had the opportunity. So many conversations I should have had that would have uncovered much I could have lived by. But I failed to take advantage of their experiences and subsequent wisdom at times and it's a regret I live with.
The hoary-headed are becoming weighed down. The pain is real and so is the feeling of being a useless drain on the economy according to those who monetize human life. I pray for those who have lost sight of human worth at every stage of life. When I was young, old age was in a distant future that had no bearing on my decisions at the time. I swore I would not get crepey skin or underarm sag. Both of which are now a part of my physical being.
When I look in the mirror, I see a young me. I'm still the same person I was many, many years ago, just older and wiser. A little beat up from the knocks of life, but still with much to offer, as are all with hoary heads.
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