Loving Wounded Souls

I am counting down the days to Christmas, less than a week now. I’ve managed to get my shopping done, all of it online so I did not have to go out into crowds. I do not do well in crowds of people. I have my husband go with me to the grocery store because I find it very stressful. I was once trapped in the middle of an extremely large crowd in a way that I would have been trampled to death if something happened. It was so tight that I was literally lifted off my feet and moving wherever the crowed moved. I had a panic attack and have never been able to do crowds every since.

Why that story? It’s an experience of trauma that has affected me in a negative way, in a long lasting way. Some may think I should just get over it. Believe me, I have tried, but it just stays with me and I’m not sure I will ever get over it. But it’s a minor trauma in comparison to other events in people’s lives which have life long, life changing effect.

I know a few women who were sexually abused and one who was raped. That kind of trauma doesn’t just go away with time. It never is healed in a way that takes all fear out of their hearts and minds. It has forever changed them. Those who have served in the military, been in wars and seen terrible things have those memories haunting them all their lives. Some cope better than others. They all are never the same as they were before the experience. It has life long effect.

There are no easy fixes for such brokenness. There is no magic wand to wave over wounded people, no pep talk able to lift their spirits, no human formulated balm for their scars. But there is the way of love, gentle sweet love that penetrates to the deepest places of pain, though it may take a very long time to reach those places. That is where human kindness and grace comes into play.

Those who’ve never experienced terrible wounding events are sometimes impatient with the walking wounded. They expect them to get over it and get on with their lives. That short sighted attitude just adds to the pain of those who have been traumatized. I know with some other more serious wounding in my life, I’ve been told that if I just had more faith I’d be healed. Instead of comforting me, it made me feel like I was a failure as a Christian and actually made God seem impatient with me as well. It just added to my pain.

The fact is God is infinitely patient with us, and tender toward those who hurt and are beyond the healing efforts of humans. He sees the deepest place in the heart and gently pours love and grace on the wounds. He knows it could take a lifetime, but he’s patient knowing in the end, there will be peace.

Christians need to do the same in their dealings with the wounded. Not pressuring, not admonishing, not trivializing. Just patiently allowing God to do what he does best and extending grace upon grace. God’s .loving kindness is to be shown in the actions of those who claim the name of Christ. So let God’s love lead to patience and tender heartedness, because your actions and your words make all the difference in the world to the wounded.