As I have walked through a long dark night of the soul, I am
re-experiencing God’s love anew. His love is unlike the love of humans, even
that of Christians many times. The bible says it is steadfast, that God’s ways
are not our ways, his thoughts not as ours. God’s love is unrelenting, without
conditions, and fiercely faithful. I recall once hearing that he was the hound
of heaven, able to track our footsteps and never lose sight of our travels
through this life even if they be convoluted.
The book of 1Corinthians, chapter 13 describes what perfect
love looks like. I must admit, I fall short many times of the kind of love God wants
us to live by. Human love is shot through with conditions and self-interest. While
unbelievers have a capacity to love, their love is completely corrupt in
comparison with God’s. But even we believers
often fail to love as we ought. How many times have we loved someone only to
grow weary of their neediness and withdraw our love and care? And what about all
the times we have convinced ourselves that those beset by sin are unworthy or untouchable?
Even the promise to love our spouses faithfully through sickness and want ends
in broken vows all too often. We fail to love others as the Lord loves us. I am
not pointing a finger. I am well aware of my lack of perfect love.
The painful reality is that while we withhold our love from
those can be difficult to love, we either deceive ourselves that we are in the
right, or we condemn ourselves before God rather than asking for forgiveness
and grace to love as we ought. The result of condemning ourselves is the
painful feeling we have failed God and his love is being withheld from us until
we meet expectations, biblical or self-imposed. Our fear leads to guilt and self
–loathing, robbing us of faith in the redeeming, endless love of God.
The truth is God’s love never condemns, nor is it meted out
in small doses based on our performance as Christians. His love is summed up in
1 John: he first loved us. His love compelled him to provide for our redemption
when we were ignorant of needing it. His passion for us was clearly shown by
the death and resurrection of the Son of God and Man, guaranteeing eternal life
in the presence of perfect love. The unconditional love showered on us frees us
to love him and others as he loves us. Do we always hit the mark? No, but the
learning curve is no longer impossible with the presence of the Holy Spirit
indwelling our hearts.
Our effort to love God’s way is a process. Opportunities
abound and whether or not we succeed in each instance doesn’t lessen God’s love
toward us. It calls unto us to keep pressing on and not give up and lose sight
of the truth. His forgiveness and abundant grace will slowly transform us to
become more Christ-like in the here and now. And when we meet him face to face,
our eyes will behold what pure love looks like and ours will be purified
completely so we may finally love our Redeemer and Father with the same love.
God’s love never fails and that truth should comfort us and
give us peace. I am still trying and at times failing, but as I continue to be
lifted out of the pit I am in, my love for God is growing. His faithfulness
towards me compels me to not lose heart. Paul said he would forget past
failures and press on to the high calling in Christ Jesus. May we all have the
same heart.
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