First Love

"But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him, and kissed him. The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' "But the father said to his servants, 'Quick Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fatted calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.'"

 Luke 15:11-24, the parable of the lost son is probably the greatest parable of all the ones Jesus told. At least it is in my estimation. If all who claim the title of Christian searched their souls and contemplated their past before embracing Jesus for the first time or from a backslidden state, they would be deeply humbled again at what the Lord has done for them. I have had a time of looking back and as a result, have relived much pain. The tears have fallen and I have struggled in anguish of soul. 

I'm not saying we should do this exercise routinely, because we are forgiven. But God calls us to love him fervently with all our hearts, souls, mind, and strength. In Revelation 2 he praised the church at Ephesus except in one area: They had lost their first love. As I read those passages in Revelation, I felt the pricking of my heart that my first love has waned. 

Yes, I still love the Lord, but I have lost the wildly passionate love I had after I was freed from the bondage of sin. So God has had me revisit my past. And the turmoil has been deep. I do not believe this process I am going through will be in vain. Like the lost son, God runs to embrace me afresh. My first love will return, and soon, by the amazing grace of God.

So I pray:

What can I possibly say to you, Lord, except, I love you. You waited for me and when the time was ready and I was starving and near death from my sinful and wasted life, you came running to me and did what the father did in the parable of the lost son. How can I possibly thank you enough? Only by giving you my heart, loving you with all my heart, my soul, my mind, and my strength.

You rescued me. I was not worthy. I’m still not worthy, yet by your death on the cross and resurrection you have made me worthy. Not because of anything I could have possibly done to earn it, but because of your great, immense, boundless love shown in the overflowing grace you’ve given me. Lord, have mercy and grant that my first love would be rekindled.

I was trapped in a miry pit. You sought me and saved me from it. All I did was ask you to take me and without hesitation, you took me back. This parable applies to all who have come to you from afar and by your mercy have come to realize how badly they need you. You do not slam the door in their faces. You do not berate. You do not make them lesser to have only the minimum. You exuberantly shower them with the best to make them as you intended them to be, like Christ.

Oh Lord God of all creation, you are merciful and mighty. Blessed be your Name for all eternity, for you alone are worthy of all honor, glory, and power. I will worship you throughout time and forever. Amen.